Hi. Been missing out on my life on this space. Life is pretty mundane. Going home after sch and all. Kinda bores me out like I've no friends to stay with even after school. Have to head home. So sick of it that I might just cry one day because I'm a loser with no friends to hang after school. Laptop can be my best friend.
Went out with family today to Nex at Balithai. A last minute one, yeap. And we changed our SCV box to the new one. We are supposed to be able to record shows and start over if we missed the previous part of the show but no I can't find the button so fuck it and wait till my sister is back home.
I'm still not getting over the fact that I'm heading home after school. What the fuck. Practically everyfuckingday. Give me a break from home and offer me out please someone.
I'm sorry V. I felt that I ruined something though I can't really say what it is.. maybe it's our friendship. Idk. Being a loner after school is bad enough now I have to lose a friend. Maybe I tried too hard. Maybe it will be better sticking to meeting once in a month if not I don't know what shit I will do. Like falling in love with you all over again which I can't let it happen.
I'm sorry Michie that I have to use this space to write to you because I find that sms is too much for me to type all out and no not msn nor skype nor facebook or even twitter. So I guess this is the only space. You might feel fucked that afterall this is not a very private space but if you really mind, do tell me and I'll take this part off okay.
Yes I know that ever since holidays started we didn't hang out a lot because you gotta work and you gotta meet your friends and all. Since then we start to have lesser topics to talk about. Like you said on your fs, I guess I'm only a classmate to you now. But I don't think this should be the way. At least we still have 5 more months before year 1 ends. As much as you don't want to leave Alfee, the feeling is with me. Like looking at you being heartbroken but you chose not to tell me and whenever there is time to ask you, you cut on me saying gotta talk to bbg on oovoo. I even tried to tell you how I feel on msn but you close down on me and went offline. Good job girl. Just tell me if you still want me as a friend. Not someone when you are in need of help then you go for. You see what I tweet and I see what you tweet. As much as your tweets are sad, I'll love to be there and advice you. And I'll love to see you coming to me asking what happen if I have any emotional tweets worth calling like you did in the past. Spamming calls when I don't pick up. I just hope that you'll understand that if you really want me there, you gotta do something about it and not just the effort I make. Like even spending time with me after school and not going back home straight every other day or meet your other friends because have you ever wondered when was the last time we spoke properly? Yes you gotta meet your friends but you have to balance. Or is it that you think losing one friend is alright because you have your favgirls plus hayley and your gilette girls. Adding on to the uncle that you're missing. If that's your choice I'm fine. Tell me straight that you don't need me there. Then that's the end of it.
Wrote the long paragraph till I am tearing fuck the last girlfriend that I'd even lay a tear on was gujuan. Fuck my life. Gotta grip a hold of myself before I really tear apart, like crying every fucking night to sleep when I did a year back literally. Bye.